5-27-19 Answers for the Family Interview with Mary Havens
Host: Allen Cardoza & Co-Host: Gabriella van Rij
Big families stow deep secrets in their underbellies. At least Mary Havens’ family did. As one of twelve children born to Wisconsin dairy farmers, Mary witnessed secrets being stashed in the shadows of her family history. She even hid some of her own. Despite the darkness that took hold in Mary’s heart, she still knew the light of laughter, family hugs, and the joys of new births and personal accomplishments. Perhaps those things helped her survive. And survive she did.

Mary Havens shares her compelling story in, The Shadows in My Heart, where she unmasks the truth and tragic consequences of family secrets and mysteries. This groundbreaking autobiography, her lifelong quest, is about real people who inhabited a sleepy, peaceful Midwestern dairy farm in the Wisconsin Ocooch Mountains.

The Shadows in My Heart twists and turns like the placid Mississippi and Wisconsin rivers, with their hidden undercurrents and shifting sandbars, which run through the Ocooch Mountains near the family farm. Mary’s impactful story flows from the coon hound hunts and Christmas celebrations of childhood to an encounter with a perverted, tobacco-smelling farmhand, to her marriage to Stan, her high school sweetheart, who never became the loving husband and father she had dreamed he would be. Overarching it all was Mary’s domineering mother, who eagerly supported the underdogs of life before she supported her own children.

The Shadows in My Heart offers strength and hope to the women and men who endure the struggles associated with domestic violence and abuse and reassures them that it is indeed possible to create a better life. Not only is Mary’s story a testament to that better life, but it is also irrefutable proof of the power of persistence, resilience, and love.

ABOUT MARY HAVENS

Mary A. Havens is the author of The Shadows in My Heart. She was born and raised on a small dairy farm in Wisconsin. After a 30-year career, she moved to Alaska where she resides today. Since 2012 when she began writing her memoir, Mary zigzagged across the country on the trails of the Lower 48 to and from Alaska. She continues her journey while promoting and speaking against domestic violence.

Mary appeared on numerous TV talk shows, including The Oprah Winfrey Show, Minneapolis’ Twin Cities Live and The Mary Hanson Show. She was a Twitter contributor for Dr. Phil and The Doctors TV shows. She is a member of the Alaska Writers Guild and participates with writers groups across the country.