Special K
You throw a splitter to strike out the side, but tear your UCL
Quaker Oh’s
You watch an antique vase fall and shatter while sheltering in place near the San Andreas Fault
Captain Crunch
You’re Johnny Depp having lunch on the set of the next Pirates of the Caribbean movie, and as you bite into a taco, you doubt if tacos are cool
Alpha-Bits
You’re trying out new material at the comedy club, but get heckled by frat bros
Froot Loops
You play what you think is a game-winning Scrabble word, but it’s actually misspelled, and now you lose a turn
Frosted Flakes
You learn that your roommates, who didn’t come skiing like they said they would, went to a different mountain instead
Trix
You’ve reached the finale of your magic act, but as you go to pull a rabbit out of your hat, it’s not there
Reese’s Puffs
You’re watching The Terminator for the first time and are deeply invested in the well-being of Sarah Connor’s protector, but then you see him get shot and start breathing heavily
Total
You’ve taken your girlfriend shopping, and after she’s brought everything up to the register, you see the amount you’ll be paying
Lucky Charms
You’re driving back home after having taken your girlfriend shopping when you narrowly avoid crashing head-on into a tractor-trailer, and although you’re lucky to be alive, you realize that the pot o’ gold you’d been daydreaming about isn’t real