We make fun of the people who paid bribes to get their kids into college. Then we make fun of the people who make fun of the people who paid bribes. Also, Facebook crashed for a day or so. Then Samantha tells us what it’s like to be a woman.

Plus, it’s springtime. So the theme in the second half is sports. Baseball and football and skydiving and our own general lack of interest in any of it. Except Mike Besaw, who actually goes to games. The rest of us are just awful.