Sonora Smart Dodd was born in Arkansas in 1882. When she was seven years old the family moved to the Pacific Northwest to build a farm near Spokane Washington where, just nine years later, her mother would die giving birth to her youngest brother, Marshall, leaving Sonora and five siblings, including an infant, for her father, William, to raise on his own.

We don’t know exactly how he did it, but he did. And despite the loneliness and the hardships, apparently he did it well. So well that Sonora, in her late twenties, after hearing a Mothers Day sermon at Central Methodist Episcopal Church, decided there needed to be a day honoring men like her father. She set to work and the first ever Fathers Day was celebrated in Spokane, Washington on June 19, 1910.

Now, by Presidential proclamation, Fathers Day is celebrated every year on the 3rd Sunday Of June.

There are outside career fathers, and stay at home fathers, and fathers who do both. There are married fathers, single fathers, widowed fathers, divorced fathers, and households with two fathers. There are fathers who’ve inherited a long legacy of good fatherhood, and there are those of us who had to figure out how to father from scratch. The story of what it means to be a father in the early 21st century—like the story of what it means to be a man—has changed drastically in recent years, and still continues to change. Men aren’t so sure anymore whether we’re supposed to be changing the world by building companies and countries, or changing the world by changing diapers. Maybe it’s both.

There’s no doubt I raised my kids differently than William Dodd raised Sonora at the turn of the 20th century. And since pretty much all the fatherhood molds have now been broken, I don’t know exactly how to describe for you what a good father “should” look like. Except perhaps for this one enduring truth: a good father strives to be exactly whatever his children need him to be.

He may not be the sole provider anymore, but he always works to provide. He may not be the sole protector but he always protects. No matter what other things a father is or isn’t, he’s always a leader, always a teacher, always a nurturer, always a big kid ready to play, and always a storyteller—teaching his kids what the world is and how the world could be.

So if we’ve had in our life one of these men—a mortal, fallible, often completely confused man who despite his many mistakes and shortcomings just keeps at it to do what he can to build a world, and a home, and a future for us …

… then we should count ourselves truly blessed.

And maybe today would be a good day to buy him yet another tie, but most of all, thank him for doing his best to build you a beautiful life.