28 MAR 2020 · (Like, Share, & Subscribe) Follow me on Instagram​, Twitter, LinkedIn, & TikTok @iwinonpurpose As the world grapples with this pandemic, COVID-19, we have to decide if we are going to take advantage of the moment or if we will sit back and complain about what's happening. No one saw this coming and our world has literally been halted. But even in the midst of uncertainty we have to make very important decisions. In this podcast we take a moment to examine where we are and also think about what we should be doing during this time. I have enlisted the help of my family to provide motivation, encouragement, and inspiration in this dire time. Listen to hear their advice on how we can best manage during this time of uncertainty. Available via: Spotify, Apple Podcast, Google Play, & iHeart Radio Music by: @ikson

2 MAR 2020 · Today podcast title is, “Perspective is Everything.” Now let’s break down what the word perspective means. The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines perspective as a mental view or prospect (to anticipate). It also defines it as the capacity to view things in their true relation or relative importance. With regard to this podcast, I want to focus on the first definition which defines perspective as a mental view or prospect. Perspective is something unique to each individual, it is our individual mental view or mindset. Therefore, how we see the world is purely based on our thoughts and expectations. We see the world as good or bad based on what we anticipate happening. If you perceive the world as being a place where you can have what you want and your dreams can come true then that will happen for you. But on the flip side, if you are a negative person and believe that things will never happen for you then that is how your life will be. You will constantly have problems and issues. Author and Motivational speaker, Wayne W. Dyer was quoted as saying, “Loving people live in a loving world. Hostile people live in a hostile world. Same world.” Have you ever been around a negative person? I mean a real negative person that all they do is complain and find something wrong with everything. Those people are the ones that live under a raining cloud 24/7. Even their energy is off. No one wants to be around them because no one can bear the constant complaining. If you take them to your favorite restaurant they find a problem with the food they ordered or the decor is grim or the tables are cleaned to their standard. They make you questions a place that you once loved. They find a problem with everything. If you are smiling they gotta question what you are happy about? Again, Dyer said, Loving people live in a loving world. Hostile people live in a hostile world. Let me add to that negative people live in a problem filled world. But the truth is we all live in the same world. Our thoughts are what shape our perspective. That is why we have to take inventory of our thoughts and pay attention to messages that are running through our minds. We have to make sure what we are thinking lines up with what we want to see happen for us. Our thoughts determine our mood, how we present ourselves, our actions and so many other things. There are so many people living fake lives and portraying false perceptions of their reality because they have convinced themselves that their fake social media life is better than their real lives. There are people going into massive debt taking trips, buying clothes, shoes, houses, and cars that they cannot afford because they want to give the impression that they are doing better than they really are. People are competing with other people that aren’t even watching. In today’s society, everyone wants to be famous. People are measuring their worth based on how many followers, views, and likes that they get. But the truth is if you are not happy where you are, there is nothing you can post, share, or buy that will change that. Even if the million followers come you will still find a reason not to be happy. We must learn to be happy with our lives as it is today. That doesn’t mean we don’t aim for more or don’t try to be better. It just means we have to learn to be grateful and thankful for the good things that is happening for us. We also can’t get so caught up in thinking that other people's lives are better than ours that we put unwarranted stress on ourselves and our relationships trying to compete with people that probably not even paying attention. Why compete with people when you are not even getting paid. If I am going to put in all that work to compete with someone I need to get paid for it. We go online or wherever [you] get [your] information and we see celebrities, our family members and friends doing all of these seemingly amazing and cool things and we think our lives are so mundane and boring. So we start trying to think of things we can post that will get people’s attention. We try to figure out how we can get more likes. I sound like I know about this, right? I know I do because I have been there! And I have to check myself on a regular and remind myself of the reasons why I use social media. My goal is to motivate, encourage, and inspire people to go for their goals. I am also on there to keep in contact with people and have fun. Scientist and Philanthropist, Sir John Lubbock said, “What we see depends mainly on what we look for.” So, this is my disclaimer to all of the nosy people out there, if you want to go on my page and see things that get upset because of what you found, its because you went looking for it. Our perspective means everything, it is everything. We have to say positive things to ourselves to cancel and drown out negative thoughts. That’s why I love daily affirmations. Affirmations help us keep our perspectives in line with what we want to happen. When we focus our minds and attention on the things that we want — we will see opportunities during times when others see opposition. I am so grateful for Lewis Howard Latimer. You might be thinking, who on earth is that? Well, of course, I am going to tell you. Latimer was an African American inventor that contributed to the invention of the light bulb and the telephone. His invention is the reason light bulbs can last for as long as they do. Here was a guy that saw a problem and instead of letting the problem control his actions he saw an opportunity to literally make the [world] a better place. I’m sure everyone has at least one light bulb in their house and we have Lewis Howard Latimer to thank for that. So the next time you looking for the perfect light to take your selfie on your cellphone give a quick shoutout to Latimer. When we say daily affirmations we remind ourselves and also reaffirm to the universe the things that we desire. Every living thing has to be feed. We have to feed our bodies, our mind, even nature needs food. The same is goes for our dreams. We have to feed our dreams daily. Affirmations is a perfect way to do just that. If you are having a down moment and not feeling inspired. Take a moment to think about what you have been thinking about... let me say that again.... when you are having a hard time or you are feeling depressed and down take a moment to think about what you are thinking about. Author, Dan Brown says, “Sometimes a change of perspective is all it takes to see the light.” I find myself doing that a lot now. It really helps me when I start feeling anxious or start having negative thoughts. My therapist introduced this method to me. She had me put a rubber band around my wrist and told me not to take it off. Anytime a bad or negative thought came to mind I had to snap the rubber band. I must be honest, that first day I was snapping that rubber band constantly. I slept in it, showered in it until it broke. That experiment opened my eyes to just how horrible my thoughts were. I had to come to grips with the fact that I had some work to do and that work started with which thoughts I wanted to feed and nurture. That exercise showed me that in order for me to be a better person for me and the people that I love, I need to change my perspective by first changing the way I was thinking. I had to remind myself of my goals and dreams. My challenge to you is to check your thoughts. Make sure your thoughts line up with what you want. Make sure we are not giving more power to our past and negativity. The only thing negative thinking does for us is give us a negative perspective on life and when we think that way we miss precious opportunities because we aren’t even looking for them. We run away good people because we think everybody is trying to take advantage us or trying to take something from us. We walk around with this rainy cloud over our heads 24/7 because we allow bad thoughts to control our lives. The only one that can control that is you! We are the only ones that can control our thoughts. That has nothing to do with society or the systems that were designed for some people to win and some people to lose. The only people responsible for our thoughts is us. Period! Poet and Playwriter, Oscar Wilde was quoted as saying, “The optimist sees the donut, the pessimist sees the hole.” Let me be clear, this is not a one time process. Controlling our thoughts is an ongoing process. It’s something we have to do every day of our lives. Even when you are on vacation. Even when it's your birthday. We must at all times keep our thoughts in check. We have to treat our thoughts, perspective, and especially our time like we would a million dollars. You wouldn’t give your money to just anyone. Or at least I hope you wouldn’t. You wouldn’t give that money to someone that would waste it. So why would you give your mental capital to people that don’t appreciate it and waste it? That’s why I have a love/hate relationship with social media. It can be very rewarding and educational if you are following the right people. But if you are following the wrong people it can be a huge waste of time and life. I couldn’t find the originator of this quote but it says, “Don’t waste your words on people that deserve your silence.”

29 JAN 2020 · (Like, Share, & Subscribe) Follow me on Instagram​, Twitter, LinkedIn, & TikTok @iwinonpurpose Today podcast topic is, ”Why Discover Why?” I’ve learned that there are times when asking the question “Why” Can be more harmful than helpful, because its too big of a question to ask. There are some questions that we want answers to that we will never figure out in this lifetime. Attempting to find the answer to “Why” can sometimes hinder our progress more than it helps. We can get stuck in the “Why” zone and find ourselves in a stale and stagnant place. But there are times when answering that question is pertinent for our lives, destiny, and for moving forward. If there is something that keeps nagging at you or you have a dream that won’t die the key to getting started is figuring out “Why” you want to get started in the first place. Again, “Why Discover Why”. To be honest, I would love to tell each individual listening today why you should pursue your dreams and aim for your goals. I wish I could tell you what the first step or the second step should be to make your dreams come true. But, unfortunately, I can’t. But what I can do is advise each of you to spend time thinking about why you have the desires you have. Spend time figuring out the true “Why” behind your dreams. This is an important question because as you start on your journey and in all stages of your journey you will run into obstacles. You will face distractions from people and life in general. But the biggest obstacle you will face will be you. Yes, you heard right, our greatest challenges does not come from the outside, they come from the inside. Author and Preacher Joyce Meyers said, “All of our problems start in our minds.” But, when we make our “Why” greater and louder than our negative thoughts, fears, and anxiety we will soon see the things that we have been believing for come true for us. Because our “Why” will drown out the negativity. I understand that our doubts can be loud and very persistent, especially the negative ones. But if we want to reach our goals and not just always be goal setters, and if we want to catch our dreams and not always be dream chasers and if we want to live big and be examples and lifestyles giants we have to make our “Why” louder than anything else we are thinking and saying to ourselves. Its a must. I can tell you that you shouldn’t let your age, upbringing and whatever else that has been stopping you for so long continue to keep you from your destiny. Author and Motivational speaker Simon Sinek says, “Finding WHY is a process of discovery, not invention.” What that means is when we are trying to figure out why we feel strongly about something or want to do something; what we are really doing is bringing to the surface the desires that already exist inside of us. We don’t have to invent or create our why. Its a process of discovery. Discovery is recognizing something that already exists for the first time, we maybe seeing it for the first time, however, its something that has always been there. An invention is creating something totally new and its something that wasn’t previously there. For years people have allowed things such as, their age to stop them from pursuing their dreams. But what we don’t realize is we are able to live longer now because of modern medicine and technology. We are able to do so much more with a lot less because of social media. We can educate ourselves a lot quicker and be more thorough thanks to the internet. So, don’t let how old or young you are stop you from doing what you want to do. We should immediately cancel out any negativity that comes in the form of thoughts and people that try to discourage us. Actress and one of the coolest people on the planet Betty White said, I think it's your mental attitude. So many of us start dreading age in high school and that's a waste of a lovely life. 'Oh... I'm 30, oh, I'm 40, oh, 50.' Make the most of it. Make the most of it, I totally agree. Because with age comes wisdom and with youth relentless fearlessness. You know I always have to talk about my kid because he teaches me so much. So, theres a popular game I am sure you all have heard of it, its called Fortnite. Its a game that you can play with hundreds of people from around the world online via a gaming system. We recently allowed him to download it and play it because he did a good job in school and we felt he was a mature enough at this age to handle it. As with everything he gets I have to play it. I’m am a kid at heart. But he showed me the basics of how to play and I watched him play several times and I even helped him win a Battle Royale, which is when you are the last player standing after everyone else has been killed. So, watching him play I felt like he was so reckless. Just running around everywhere, out in the open, not making sure he had enough ammo and enough shields. He’s ignoring the chest that has all of this great stuff in there and Im like JJ, you need to get this, you need to be covert, hide behind that tree…. Mommy talk, basically. But, ooooh when it was my time. I lasted in that game all of 30 seconds before someone came and popped me and all we could do was laugh. I had the wisdom to help him win, but I didn’t have the fearlessness that he had to win myself. There are countless inventions, books, movies, plays, presidents, senators, CEO’s, athletes etc. that are lying dead in a graveyard because many people believed they were too old, too young, not educated enough, didn’t come from the right neighborhood or weren’t the right color or their past had too many blemishes on it for them to deserve a second chance. It’s sad. It is really sad the things that the world has missed out on because people talked themselves out of their dreams. No one is perfect, we all have made mistakes. Everyone has skeletons in their closet, but there’s absolutely no reason why we should not try. Even in your trying you are going to make mistakes. I have made too many to count in my lifetime. Some were preventable, some weren’t. But I was so happy when I saw the quote by artist Samantha Snyder was quoted as saying, mistakes are proof you are trying. Back in the day, I believed mistakes were a sign from God and the universe that this wasn’t for me or God that was teaching me some lesson. Or the universe was trying to tell me that I was going in the wrong direction. Sometimes that maybe the case. But now I know those mistakes were and are part of my destiny and part of my story and they are in the past. I can not change a single thing about it. I have to keep living and keep trying and understand that mistakes will happen when you try to do anything new. Author, Joe Abercrombie said, “I have learned all kinds of things from my many mistakes. The one thing I never learn is to stop making them.” We may feel like some mistakes are bigger than others. We think because we’ve had a rough past or a trying childhood that we can’t possibly do whats in our hearts. But what if what you learned while making your mistakes was so you could help someone else not go down that same road. Your mistakes may follow you for the rest of your life, but that doesn’t have to stop your destiny. That does not mean you don’t have purpose. And its even more important for you to discover your “Why” because you may have to be a little more creative with how you make your dream a reality. You may have to hear a couple more “No’s”. You may have to work a little bit harder to prove you are trustworthy. But what you should never do is give up. The universe is the architect, we are the builders. When the universe allows experiences (good or bad) to happen to us, it’s our job as builders of our personal destiny to build on our experiences, again (good, bad, whatever). I’m sure most of you have heard the saying, “you can either let it make you or break you.” We are the builders in our lives and many of us have been trying to be the creators and that is where the frustration, anxiety, stress, and depression comes from. There is only one Creator, the Most High God. Because we are trying to make things happen that we have no control over and we focus so much on the things we cannot control that we lose sight of the things that we can control and miss out on great opportunities. We miss out on beautiful experiences and moments. Then we become envious and jealous of those that understand where their focus should be and become successful because of it. Not realizing that if we do the same things, focus on what we can control, build from our life experiences, and live and enjoy every moment in our lives we to can be successful if not more successful and live our dreams too. Journalist, Dan Rather said, “If all difficulties were known at the outset of a long journey, most of us would never start out at all.” Napoleon Hill was quoted as saying, The way to develop decisiveness is to start right where you are, with the very next question you face. So, the very next question I want each of us to face is the “Why” question. Write down everything that comes to mind. Some of your “Why’s” may seem trivial and insignificant. Write them down anyway and as you continue with your discovery I promise there will be at least three that will stick out. Those will be the ones that you hold on to. Add them to your morning routine. Read them or say them out loud everyday. And if you working a job you hate, remind yourself of your “Why” before you cross the threshold of that place just so you realize that that place is not the end of your journey. Available via: Spotify, Apple Podcast, Google Play, & iHeart Radio Music by: Steffanccino and miyagisama

27 DEC 2019 · (Like, Share, & Subscribe) Follow me on Instagram​ @iwinonpurpose Today podcast topic is, ”Will You Leap?” We are entering a new year and coming to a close of another decade. We are about to be in the year 2020! Can you believe it? I thought we would have flying cars and be living in floating houses and apartments by now. If we haven’t learned anything by now one thing that we know for sure is that time waits for no one. Life keeps going whether we keep going or not. And as we embark on this new year and new decade, I want to leave you with this question to ponder, “Will You Leap?” That’s a loaded question, I know. There’s a Zen (Zen is a part of the Buddhist religion that emphasizes the practice of meditation and intuition) principle that says, “Leap and the net will appear.” As we move out of 2019, I want you to answer this question for your life and your destiny. “Will you Leap?” 2020, the upcoming year is a leap year. For those that may not know, leap years have an extra day in February, so instead of there being 28 days in February there are 29. Leap years occur every four years. So, I believe this question of “Will You Leap” is fitting considering. Here are some of the many questions we have to answer as we move into 2020. Will I step up this year? Will I do it (whatever it maybe for you) afraid? Will I do what you need to do to make my dream a reality? Will I let go of my past mistakes so I can finally step into my future? Will I take that leap of faith into the unknown and take some risk to get where you want to go? “Will You Leap”…. Leap and the net will appear is a statement of faith. It’s saying that we have to make the first move. We have to take the first step. We have to go even when we don’t see a clear path ahead of us…. But when we make that leap of faith, we say to to ourselves, to God, and the universe that we believe in us. We believe in our purpose more than what we can see. We believe enough in our dreams that we leap because we know that the net is there to catch us even if we can’t see it at the moment. More often than not, when we set out to do things outside of the norm the path seems unclear, bleak, scary, dark, fuzzy. We don’t really know how we are going to get from point A to point B. But those that succeed abide by the Zen principle which again says, Leap and the net will appear. Those that succeed abide by the Christian principle which says, Walk by faith and not by sight. Author and alternative medicine advocate, Deepak Chopra says, "The universe has no restrictions. You place restrictions on the universe with your expectations." We place restrictions on the universe…we place restrictions on the opportunities that come to us. We place restrictions on how far we go because of our expectations. What place restrictions by refusing to change and continue to allow toxic people to hang around and pollute our minds. Another serious question we have to ask ourselves is, what are we expecting to happen in 2020. Are you expecting it to be another year of the same ole same ole? Are you expecting to go to the same ole dead in job that has zero room for upward movement? Or are you expecting to get a job this year that you actually enjoy going to everyday. Are you expecting to stay unemployed or are you expecting this year to be the year that you get the job you want, making the money you want, doing the things that you love. Are you expecting to keep talking about what you want to do this year or are you going to actually step out and do it? Please hear me when I saw, I know that winning and taking chances come at a cost. I understand that things won’t be easy. I know that just because you are expecting to win and you are taking that leap of faith that doesn’t mean adversity will not come. Adversity will come. When you take that leap of faith it will seem as if hell opened up its doors and unleashed everything in its arsenal to knock you off your purpose. —But you gotta know that whatever is thrown at you, somebody somewhere has experienced it and conquered it and kept going. 2019 threw things at me that I never imagined I would experienced. I got knocked on my face this year. And I have been living in a concussed state since April. I literally thought I was going to die. In May of this year I didn’t think I would live to be talking to you in 2020. BUT! With the help of God, my amazing family and friends and to be honest chemical help and therapy I am now in the process of bouncing back. I am not there yet, but I am getting better and I am expecting great things to happen in 2020. I am expecting things that didn’t happen in 2019 to happen in 2020. I am expecting that scale to finally say the number that I want it to say… I am going to do things that I have been afraid to do. I am going to take the leap. Businessman, John A. Shedd was quoted as saying, "A ship in harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for.” We were not built to play it safe. We were not built to live in hiding too afraid to live, too afraid to die. We were not built to live in fear. Those dreams and ideas that you have were not given to you just for you to think about them for 5 and 10 years. You were given those dreams and desires for a reason. You may not be the originator of it, but you know what that makes your work easier because know you have a cheat code. You have a roadmap to follow. My son’s school has an enrichment class that teaches the kids different skills. They have drawing, They can learn to play a musical instrument, but my son chose Rubik’s Cube. Before he signed up for that class I hadn’t seen a Rubik’s cube in years. I had always wanted to solve one, but I was never even able to solve a color. So, in his class a couple of weeks ago, they taught the kids how to solve a color. I was just watching him and thinking, there is absolutely no way this kid is going to solve this cube before I do. You know the first place I went to? If you guess YouTube you guessed correctly! I went on there and it took me about three days, but I finally solved a Rubik’s Cube not once, not twice but three times. Now, I am trying to do it from memory. I said that to say this, you can learn how to do pretty much any and everything on the internet. There is absolutely no reason anyone can say, I don’t know how to do this. If you want to be better at social media…ask the internet. If you want tips on public speaking…ask the internet. If you want to figure out what you need to get enrolled in school…ask the internet. Poet and Philosopher, Ralph Waldo Emerson was quoted as saying, "Don't be too timid and squeamish about your actions. All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better.” You know, take the pressure off yourself. Give yourself a break. See this journey as an experiment, you are trying something out. Starting out you are not going to be perfect. You are going to make mistakes, and that’s okay. You are going to want to quit. You are going to quit. But in all of that you will learn how to do things better. You will learn what not to do. The things that seems so detrimental at one stage in life you will hopefully be able to look back at it and see the many things you learned. But you will only be able to look back and smile only if you make that leap and don’t quit. Author and Motivational speaker Gary Vaynerchuk says, “Don’t ever let your circumstances determine your outcome. You are bigger and better than that. You can always control your own destiny. Use what you’ve got, find what you don’t, and make your dreams come true.” Use what you’ve got, find what you don’t and make your dreams come true. I wanna say that one more time. Use what you’ve got, find what you don’t, and MAKE your dreams come true. —Will You Leap? Will 2020 be the year you step out on faith or will it be business as usual for you? Are you going to go for that promotion this year? Or are you going to continue to let your brain die in that position that you can do with your eyes close. Are you going to start that business in 2020? Or are you going to continue to let all those negative voices in your head control your destiny? Are you going to finally lose that weight you’ve been talking about losing for years or are you going to continue to be controlled by food? Will you leap? Speaker and minister, Sarah Jakes Roberts said, “Embrace the uncomfortable to become unstoppable.” I want to make this very clear just because you decide to make the leap does not mean everything is going to be easy. You will have challenges and hardships. There will be times when you feel uneasy. You are going to lose some sleep. But I believe whatever we experience we will be able to look back and say with confidence, it was worth it. After all that I have lost over the years and everything I have experienced and the things that have been stolen from me…I refuse to have gone through everything I have gone through for nothing. The pain, tears, embarrassment, lose…will not be for nothing. So again, I ask you “Will You Leap?” Author and Life Coach Barbara Sher which says, "When you play it too safe, you're taking the biggest risk of your life. Time is the only wealth we're given." What are you going to do with this wealth of time that you have? Will you use it to leap into your destiny or are you going to just watch time pass you by? Before you know it we will be entering another decade. What will you be able to say you have done in this decade? Before 2019 ends, I suggest we all take inventory of our lives and make a list of things that we refuse to take into the new year. What are you going to leave behind on December 31, 2019? Don’t just make the leave behind list, but also make a list of the things you plan to do in 2020 and hold yourself accountable to it. Available via: Spotify, Apple Podcast, Google Play, & iHeart Radio Music by: Steffanccino, imthesolo, and miyagisama

15 NOV 2019 · (Like, Share, & Subscribe) Follow me on Instagram​ @iwinonpurpose First I want to start by saying that everyone should have something to live for. If we didn’t have something to live for then I don’t believe that we would wake up, if we aren’t living for something then there would be no need for us to get out of bed. It is our job in life to discover why we are put on this earth to do.   The past couple of podcasts we have been exploring dream killers. Dream killers are those things that stop us from becoming the people that we desire to be and do the things that we were put on this earth to do. I want to stay with that idea and remind us of the importance of keeping our original and purest purpose at the forefront of our thoughts as much as possible. As we discussed previously, it is so easy to get distracted because our lives are so busy with work, family, school, and just trying to keep up with it all. We live in a constant cycle of busyness to the point where sometimes our goals, desires, and purpose gets pushed to the back burner. I have been guilty of it and I am sure I am not the only one. Its like we give the most attention to the things that are in front of us. That is not necessarily a bad thing, but if we are not careful we will find that 10 years have gone by and we are still stuck in the dream phase of our purpose. That is why its good to have a morning or evening routine where we give time to your purpose “on purpose” daily. This can be done by creating a digital vision board, or writing a personal message to ourselves that we recite daily, make the title of our morning alarm our purpose so thats the first thing we see in the morning. Whatever it takes to stay on course and keep your purpose in view lets aim to do that. Author and motivational speaker Zig Ziglar was quoted as saying, “The fact is that you can’t hit a target that you can’t see.” So if we are NOT giving time and attention to our purpose then we will never achieve them.   We also have to make sure that our goals line up with our purpose. Our goals are the milestone we use to ensure we achieve our desired outcome. When we are listing our goals we have to make sure they are attainable and not just a wish list. Wish are things like, I want to be rich, I want to lose weight, I want to be happy, etc. But goals are specific and detailed. My son started at a new school this year and one of the things they measure and are graded on is setting goals and achieving them. I was SO surprised when I saw that. My son is in 3rd grade and they already want them to set measurable goals for themselves and they are grading them on that. So, what I have incorporated in his study time on Monday nights is he has to set a goal for the week and when we get his grades for the week we discuss if he attained that goal or not. If they are doing that in 3rd grade, how much more should we as adults should be setting attainable goals for ourselves. Even for those that have full time jobs. We should not just show up to work everyday and let the day rule us, we need to have a purpose for those eight to nine hours we are there. Author Brian Tracy says, “Goals give you that sense of meaning and purpose, a clear sense of direction. As you move toward your goals you feel happier and stronger. You feel more energized and effective. You feel more competent and confident in yourself and your abilities.”   “Our goals is the roadmap that leads us to our purpose.” If you are like me, you need things to be simple and broken down. So, some people maybe wondering how to determine if you have a goal or a wish. A goal is something measurable. You can set deadlines for goals. In the previous podcast, I told you all about my hangover. For those that didn’t hear the last podcast I referred to my stomach as my new hangover. Since then I set out on a weight loss journey to lose 20 lbs and get my stomach back in line with my hips. I had to set goals to reach my purpose. What I had to do was get goals for my eating and exercising. I had to change my sleeping habits. So my measurable goal is to lose a minimum of 1 lb per week. In order to attain that 1 lb per week goal I have had to reduce my carb intake (particularly alcohol) and exercise at least three days a week and burn a minimum of 300 lbs each day I go to the gym. I also have to make sure that I get at least 6 hours of sleep per night, my bedtime now is 10PM. I have not been perfect with my goals. I haven’t attained them every time, but least when I get off track I have something to go back to to get back on track. The purpose is the what, and the goals are the how.   Its not enough to have an amazing purpose and attainable goals. What’s equally important is acting. There is no reason to keep your purpose in sight and do all of this if you are not going to act on it. Albert Einstein was quoted as saying, “Nothing happens until something moves.” I can laugh and joke and tell you all day long about my weight issues. I can say to myself a 1000 times a day that I want to lose weight but the truth of the matter is it won’t happen until I “on purpose” do something about it. I have to make lifestyle changes. I have to make hard decisions. I am a night person. I can stay up ALL night, but as I have gotten older my body needs more rest and in order for me to be healthier I have to give my body what it needs which is rest and get my butt to bed at a decent hour.   If you are feeling stuck, you have your what or in other words you know what you want to do, but you are confused as to how to do it start by creating some attainable goals that line up with your purpose to help you start your journey. That maybe taking some classes to help you learn a particular skill. Finding a mentor that is willing to take you under their wing and give you some direction. Do some research online. Sign up for a workshop. Whatever you need to do to move forward towards your purpose I say do it.   Don’t lose sight of your purpose. You were given this desire for a reason. What you desire to do is attainable. You can do it. Trust yourself. Don’t allow doubts to sit and fester in your mind to the point where you talk yourself out of what you really want. Believe in yourself. Entrepreneur Mary Kay Ash said, “We must have a theme, a goal, a purpose in our lives. If you don’t know where you’re aiming you don’t have a goal.” Available via: Spotify, Apple Podcast, Google Play, & iHeart Radio Music by: silencekills and leswagcupcakes

26 AUG 2019 · (Like, Share, & Subscribe) Follow me on Instagram​ @iwinonpurpose Today’s podcast title is “Victory Starts With Me”. In keeping with the theme of the last to podcast I really want us to focus on self improvement and self acknowledgement and understand just how important we are to making our dreams come true. I know that sounds so obvious, but when you think about it many of us are really relying too much on happenstance, luck, and blessings falling out the sky. I think if we put more energy in putting our hands to the plow as the Bible states we will see more things began to open up. I’ve been on a weight loss journey for about three years now and it appears that every year my weight goes higher and higher... There was one point last year when I was really serious and going to the gym three times a week. I was focused and determined to get back to my high school weight. When I tell you I got very close. I was off my three pounds. I thought I was doing it. Needless to say, my sexy swag didn’t last long because after that I went on an eating spree. Mind you during this time I wasn’t really dieting per say, I really focused on exercising and I reached my goal. Now I find myself back in this weigh loss fight again. But only this time, I have a hangover (my stomach) that I’m trying to burn away. I was having a conversation with my sister this week and she was talking to me about her weigh loss journey and she said something that really stuck with me. She said, it doesn’t matter how many trainers, dietitians, or doctors you have working with you at the end of the day you are the one doing the work. All I could say was, “Amen sista”. Again, here’s another instance where the buck ends and begins with you, me, I, us. Ralph Emerson was quoted as saying, “Where ever work is done, victory is attained.” He also said, “Work is victory”. In my Iyanla Vanzant voice, always remember baby, “you gotta do the work.” Ill be the first to tell you, I don’t enjoy hard work. I am the type of person that will do whatever it is I need to do to avoid hard work. I will ponder 30 mins on the quickest and easiest way to do something especially if it involves me doing something that will make me sweat or feel sore later. Hence the reason I have a hangover now. If we are honest with ourselves many of us would agree that we don’t like working hard. Hence the reason there are so many people going to jobs, giving a place 40 plus hours a week and they are miserable. Its much harder to go back to school and get another degree and work while in school verses taking a student loan to pay it off. Its much harder going to the gym everyday before or after work to exercise though extra pounds off than it is to go to a doctor that let them burn or freeze it off. Right? But think about this, how much would you appreciate a victory if its just given to you. How can you help someone else overcome their battle if you take the short cuts and the cheap way out? That’s what winning is about, right? We want to “Win on Purpose” so we can show our children and our children’s children how to win. Plato said, “Self conquest is the greatest of victories.” I have never interviewed, or read an interview from anyone and heard them say, I never get tired, I love to do this all day everyday.Even the most successful people get burned out, they feel lazy, they get discouraged by defeats and so on. We know we are going to get tired, so why not push through it and keep going. We know we are going to get discouraged, so why not keep going in the midst of the sadness. We have to push through our natural human emotions sometimes if we want to win. If we want to be victorious at anything we MUST fight for our victory. Again, Emerson said, “Work is Victory.” Victory is work. One of the greatest things we have to conquer within ourselves is fighting our doubts. If anyone comes in my face and tell me they don’t doubt themselves and never have, I will show a liar for sure. We all have those moments of doubt, and times when we question ourselves and question if we can do it. We question if its what we are suppose to be doing. I am still questioning if I am supposed to be doing this podcast believe it or not. But I keep doing it because I wish I had someone in my life rooting for me and pushing me and encouraging me to pursue my dreams. Not that my parents weren’t supportive of my siblings and me, they were just more so focused on us going to school and getting a degree and all that jazz. But if I knew then what I knew now....(pause) I am not gonna say it. Music artist NF says, “Quit taking advice from your doubts.” If you are in a place where you don’t want to be today — part of it is because you listened more to your doubts than you did your hopes. I know that our doubts can from in the form of being “realistic” thats what we call it. I’m just being realistic. My question to all of the “realist” out there, I want just say you create your reality. “We create our reality.” So am I saying that we wont ever experience defeat? Not at all, but what I am saying is we decide what we do in the midst of defeat, whether we keep going or give up and that determines our reality. The unknown person said, “sometimes you win, sometimes you learn.” So from your losses and defeats what will you take from it? Will you aim to get better and be better and most importantly be victorious. Or will you allow yourself to drown in it and suffocate from it? The choice is yours and mine! I choose to learn the lesson and keep pursuing my dreams. Yeah, I’m three years into my weigh loss journey and I have experienced some blows in that timeframe that set me all the way back, but I am not going to give up. I am determined to be like wine, and get better with time. - - (I know that was mad corny, but you get the point.) Don’t discount the small victories because are proof that you are going in the right direction. World Champion soccer player, Mia Hamm says, “Take your victories, whatever they may be, cherish them, use them, but don’t settle for them.” When we accept the idea what victory starts with us, we cant blame anyone for anything in our lives. Every single person on planet earth has been wronged, stolen from, abused, picked on, doubted, you name it. But its up to us to find a way to channel all of that negativity. Should we not do what we really want to do because someone stole our idea? Should we stop doing what we want because people are doubting us? Should we not pursue our dreams because someone said it was stupid? I mean who would have thought that we would be walking around with handheld computers that we cant live without? Well, somebody did because most of us have cellphones these days. Nike has a ad slogan that says, “All dreams are crazy until they come true.” So why not give your dreams the opportunity to come true? Two things happened that really made me realize the world has changed, one, my mom got a facebook account and two my dad traded his flip phone for a smartphone and got a debit card. I had a Beyoncé “world stop” moment, “world stop”. Let me tell you. If you know my dad....your entire outlook on life would have changed too. In all seriousness, sit down and evaluate your life, like really take inventory and determine what nurtures your dreams and what things are detrimental to them. Are there some people that you need to disconnect from? Whatever it is you have set out to attain, as much as possible try to limit the negativity surrounding that thing. Sometimes you have to get drastic with it too. I made a vow that I would not get on social media for six months. It started at the end of May beginning of June. This year I have experienced heartbreak like never before. I will talk about it at some point I am just not ready now. But in the midst of what I was going through I really found that social media wasn't helping me at all. It was actually making me feel worst. Because its a challenging to see everyone happy when you are feeling like shit! What I have found it that was one of the best decisions I could have made. I feel much clearer in my thinking. I am able to be present in my own life. My focus is on what’s happening in front of me. Has it been easy? Not at all. Its been about two months and I still think sometimes, oooo I wish I could post this picture, or I should post this quote. It was really a struggle to not go on or post on my @iwinonpurpose instagram, because I am trying to build it up and I have made some great friends on there. But for my sanity I had to. Its weird not knowing what the trending topics are and who the latest viral sensation is, but I know in the end it will all be worth it. I’ve even thought about doing this every year. Six months on, six months off. But I am not going to jump ahead of myself. The late great Muhammad Ali was quoted as saying, “The fight is won or lost far away from witnesses - behind the lines, in the gym and out there on the road, long before I dance under those lights.” Available via: Spotify, Apple Podcast, Google Play, & iHeart Radio Music by: silencekills and leswagcupcakes

25 APR 2019 · (Like, Share, & Subscribe) Follow me on Instagram​ @iwinonpurpose It is so easy to get stuck in the comparison minefield. I call it a minefield because when we give a lot of time and attention to what other people are doing it make us lose our focus and causes us to get off our path and when we do that it leads to destruction. There is nothing wrong with admiring and applauding people for their successes. But when we start comparing our lives with other peoples lives it does nothing, but diminish, in our eyes, our progress and success. Whenever you are trying to achieve a goal, you want to sidestep as many distractions and as much negativity as possible. Because those things are readily available and we don’t need to add to the minefield. Available via: Spotify, Apple Podcast, Google Play, & iHeart Radio Music by: minor2go

15 MAR 2019 · (Like, Share, & Subscribe) We are three months into 2019 and I hope that everyone is still holding down their goals and sticking to things you set out to accomplish this year. But if not, don’t worry you still have nine months to make it happen. So, make it happen! On today’s podcast we are going to call out some simple, but culprits that are very successful at killing dreams. I’ve been gone for awhile so lets not waste any more time. Let’s dive right in. The first dream killer that I want to bring our attention to is very common, but it can also disguise itself in many forms and sometimes we don’t recognize it immediately when it shows up. This dream killer’s name is DISTRACTION! It’s so easy to fall prey to distractions in the age that we live in because we have more technology today and more access to the world than any other generation that has ever lived on the planet. Not only do we have social media, Netflix, amazon, work, and other things that takes our focus away, but we are also a society that is constantly evolving and growing. And there are so many things and people vying for our attention it can be challenging to focus on just one thing more or less our dreams. Leadership and Personal Mastery specialist Robin Sharma says, “your life is too important to give it to distractions.” Think about it, when is the last time you were able to go somewhere and be alone with your thoughts for a day or even a couple of hours. How many of us can sit in a room for an hour without grabbing at our phone every minute to check emails, text messages or social media? I remember growing up, when it would rain, my mom was the type that would shut everything off if it was thundering and lightening. We would open the door lay on the floor and just listen to the rain as a family. No lights, no TV, no AC and yes it was hot! But we were together and created bonds and memories with each other that cannot be broken to this day. Today, quiet time and alone time has become non-existent. It’s like we are too afraid to sit in peace and quiet because we are afraid of what may come up. Past hurts that we’ve tried for years to ignore, past demons that we never dealt with. Actually having to deal with our insecurities and the areas that we fill we are lacking in, all of these things can be quite scary to face. So, our way of dealing with it is to keep ourselves preoccupied. We like to believe that being busy is synonymous with being productive. But I guarantee if we reevaluate our schedules we would find that there are several things that can be cut out that we wouldn’t even miss. Or if we miss them it would be a short term withdrawal. Play-writer and Director Lorraine Hansberry was quoted as saying, “Never be afraid to sit awhile and think.” Some people’s schedule is their greatest distractor. We need to ask ourselves: What do I really need to do? What do I need to let others do? (and) What doesn’t need to be done at all? Distractions also come in the form of people. Some of our so called friends are nothing more than distractions. If we are honest with ourselves we would see half the people that we call friends are not even people that truly want to see us succeed. Many of them are people hanging around waiting to see what’s going to happen. Some of them are spy’s for our enemies and others are just place holders for when we want someone to hang out with. If we are real with ourselves we can admit that true friends challenge us. Here’s how you can tell is a person is a true friend: They require us to rise to a certain level. They demand that we give our best to our dreams. They encourage and uplift us. They are not constantly running back telling us what negative things people say about us. Real friends are not trying to compete with us. True friends tell us the truth even though it maybe hard to hear and they tell us the truth in love. You can clearly tell when a person is telling you something to help you verses hurt you. All the time it's not an easy pill to swallow. When you first hear them say it, even if its in love, it may rub you the wrong way, but be man and woman enough to give yourself time to process what they said and examine it for yourself. Because more often than not what they are telling you is the truth and a truth that you have tried to ignore. True friends would rather hurt your feelings in love than see you go out and make a fool of yourself. But a lot of us don’t want people around us that’s going to tell us the truth. We want an amen corners. If everyone in your circle agrees with you all the time and you never hear no or maybe you should rethink that idea then you need to upgrade your circle. Prime example, Robert Kelly, if you listen to interviews from people that have been around him many of them said the same things. He had a lot of “yes” people around him. People that would do whatever we wanted when he wanted. He didn’t have a lot of objective voices providing him with sound advice and look where that got him. If you don’t know what’s going on with him, google it there’s a ton of info available. A quote by an unknown person says, “if you lose a friend because you are honest [they were’nt] a good friend.” There’s no better time than today to get rid of the people that are not pushing you towards your dreams and your future. 2019 is the year we decide to be better and for many of us that starts with not returning some phone calls and text messages, blocking some people on social media, and completely disappearing from some folks. I’m not a fan of ghosting people, some people are not worth a goodbye conversation. Some people you can disappear on and they would never know. It’s okay to being okay letting people go that are not good for you. Another dream killer that we encounter is DISBELIEF & UNBELIEF in ourselves. I cannot tell you the number of people that I have talked to and spent time with that have a wealth of wisdom, knowledge and great ideas that they are just sitting on. I mean people that could write books that would land on the “Times Best Seller” list, but they don’t believe that it is possible or they don’t value what they have, so they don’t pursue it. They wave their knowledge and insight off thinking, “aw its nothing, I am sure everyone knows that.” But you would be surprise the things people do not know. Just because something comes easy to you or an idea seems minuscule to you, that doesn’t mean it wouldn’t be something that would change other peoples lives. We don’t believe that we have anything to offer the world. We don’t believe we can actually be successful. We don’t think anyone needs what we have. Think about this, what if Maya Angelo thought the same way. What if Serena Williams shrunk back in her sister’s Venus shadow and thought, “She’s already great at tennis, surely I cant be good at it too.” What if Rihanna decided that since there are a million and one makeup companies out there why create another one? What if Cardi B didn’t believe in herself and decided not to give music a try? Like, seriously, we will never know the potential difference we could make, and the success we could have if we never try. What is that thing that you know like the back of your hand, what’s that advice that everyone always comes to you about? What are you great at? You don’t have to have all the answers on how to start and what to do in the beginning. As you begin to pursue your dreams, you will find that the answers will come to you. I wrote a quote a while ago that says, “If you don’t give yourself a chance, it will never be your time.” I know a lot of us are wondering when our time is coming. When will the stars align in my favor? Will the universe ever make my dreams a reality? My question to you is, are you giving yourself a chance? Do you believe in you? Do you believe in your abilities? Are you dismissing what you are good at? Novelist Alice Walker says, "The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don't have any.” That starts with you valuing what you have enough to believe in yourself. You will never be able to sell a product to anyone until you first believe in it. In 2016, I wrote this affirmation and I have reincorporated in my life in 2019. It says, I life a lifestyle that is sustainable. All of my dreams are attainable. I keep my focus on Christ who leads and guides me so my mistakes are minimal. I cherish every moment of my life the good, bad, and ugly. Everyday I am alive gives me an opportunity to become a better person. I will not reduce my standards to fit someone else’s plans. I stand firm on my beliefs, therefore, I live a life free of guilt and shame and filled with heavenly promises. My path is sure, my confidence is contagious and I never lose. I use mistakes to show me better methods to accomplish my goals. Available via: Spotify, Apple Podcast, Google Play, & iHeart Radio Music by: silencekills