Little Simon thinks his dad's a dick, a Scarwars caller tells us how he ended up with a bayonet through his head, Mel gets creeped out by a panty thief, there's a new type of clientele at Nosh, Deaker is not happy at Piri Weepu, and Don Brash tells us what he's got lined up for Valentines Day. MUSIC: Cold Chisel, Nirvana, Devilskin, Rob Zombie, and Chris Cornell. PLUS: special song pisstakes from Blair Dowling from when he used to work with Trotty on MoreFM.