The internet is acting up again, and Clint Coley (@clintcoley) and Jasmine Burton (@finessquire) are here to break down the sheer madness on this week’s episode of The Weekly Report!

First up, the duo reacts to Enes Kanter’s wild claims about making a jump to the WNBA—Clint has thoughts on the sports logistics, while Jasmine questions the entire premise.

Then, they dive into a 50th birthday party that turned into a full-blown self-wedding. Is it ultimate self-love, or did someone just really want a tiered cake and registry gifts?Later in the show:

• The Grim Reaper at the Hospital: A guy gets arrested for haunting hospital grounds in full costume—harmless stunt or absolute menace behavior?
• Spider-Man Saves the Summer: How Spider-Man single-handedly revived the summer blockbuster experience and got everyone back into movie theaters.
• Drake’s Toronto Influencer Dinner: Drake hosted an exclusive dinner for local creators, and the hosts dissect who got the invite, who got snubbed, and the social media fallout that followed.

Follow the hosts on Instagram: @clintcoley & @finessquireGrab your seat at the table—it’s time for The Weekly Report!