Wisdom-Trek / Creating a Legacy
Welcome to Day 189 of our Wisdom-Trek, and thank you for joining me.
This is Guthrie Chamberlain, Your Guide to Wisdom.
Discuss, Never Argue
Thank you for joining us for our 7 days a week, 7 minutes of wisdom podcast. This is Day 189 of our Trek and yesterday we studied The Science of Making Wise Decisions. Today we will explore why it is wise to always discuss issues, and not argue. If you miss any days of our Wisdom-Trek episodes, please go to Wisdom-Trek.com to listen to them and read the daily journal.



We are recording our podcast from our studio at ‘The Big House’ in Marietta, OH.  After meeting with our renovation contractor, we decided to go ahead and have the ceilings in the Library, Parlor and downstairs hallway/foyer all dry-walled at the same time since it will save us the additional cost of mobilization and scheduling.  Because of this, I will be working on Saturday to remove the acoustical ceiling tiles in the Parlor and downstairs hallway/foyer.  This was not part of our plans for this weekend so I will have to work quickly to get it all completed.  We will also be looking at replacing the windows in the Library and Parlor this spring.  The original windows in the house are drafty and not as functional as as they should.

We are looking forward to the Marietta grandkids coming over Saturday evening, and I am sure they will love helping gramps with additional renovations.  I will leave the wallpaper for them to remove.  It is quite old and comes off easily.

Let’s move onto our Trek for today as we set out on our trails to discover why it is wise and prudent to always discuss matters of differences, and avoid arguing.  When Paula and I were dating the year before being married, one ground rule that I set between us is that I would not argue with her.  I wanted to set the guideline for our marriage and felt that as differences arose, then as intelligent and rational adults we could calmly discuss any issues that we may have.  After over 36 years of marriage, I can say that we have kept that commitment, and have never had any type of significant arguments between us.  It is possible if you are committed to making it work.



Now onto our trail for today which we will call…
Discuss, Never Argue
There are some personalities that can be labeled as argumentative and that shows in their behavior and relationships. Arguments can be avoided and a lot of heartaches prevented by being a little careful. The best way to win an argument is to avoid it. An argument is one thing you will never win. If you win, you lose; if you lose, you lose. If you win an argument but lose a good job, customer, friend or marriage, what kind of victory is it? Pretty empty.

Arguments result from an inflated ego. Arguing is like fighting a losing battle. Even if one wins, the cost may be more than the victory is worth. Emotional battles leave a residual ill will, even if you win. In an argument, both people are trying to have the last word. The argument is nothing more than a battle of egos and results in a yelling contest.


·       How do you 'Argue' With Your Spouse or Close Friend?
There should be no losers. Do you really want your spouse [whom you love] or friend to lose an argument with you? Think how constantly losing arguments with you plays on your spouse's or friend’s self-esteem. Did you know spouses influence each others self-esteem more than any other factor during their married life? Arguments are usually started because one spouse feels that the other is messed up or wrong. The Bible has something to say about how to correct someone when you feel they are wrong.