Does your wife have inappropriate male friends? How are you going to think about that?
This is specifically for the husband in a rocky marriage where you feel boundaries are being crossed. And for some reason you haven’t figured out what to do about it yet.

Your wife’s “boyfriends” may come in various shapes and sizes. These are some of the descriptions I hear from husbands about the questionable men she has in her life.

“At parties, she surrounds herself with men and initiates sexual conversations and dirty jokes with them.”

“She always gravitates toward this one guy in the neighborhood and enthusiastically hugs him when we leave – nobody else – just him.”

“She has lunch nearly every day at work with a male colleague who is “just a good friend” going through some tough times.”

She is chatting on Facebook frequently with an old boyfriend.”

“She constantly exchanges texts with a male friend who is in a bad marriage and says she is just supporting him.”

“She ignores me at home and lights up like a Christmas tree around other men whenever we go out socially. She laughs and talks with them in ways she used to do with me.”

“She says she wants to share a hotel suite with her business colleague to save money for the company during the 3-day conference.”

“She goes to happy hour every Friday with her boss because she thinks her job depends on it. And I’m not invited.”

“She chewed me out for rudely interrupting her on a phone call in our kitchen with the guy she now refers to as her lover.” (yeah, really)

Those real-life examples span the scale of “appropriateness”. But I believe there is a way to prepare yourself to respond to any one of them with a calm, clear-headed, confident strength.

As you read those I imagine you developed knots in your stomach and now you want to scream something into your computer/phone/whatever your gadget is.

No need. I understand your feelings.

But let’s talk about your thoughts on this.