Many people love to talk, but effective people love to listen.  Seek first to understand the question beneath the question. This episode is Powered by Pod Decks , with unique interview questions and episode starting prompts in the palm of your hand. Use code HELENDECKS for 10% off your first order! Transcript: (Full Show Notes at WhoYouNeeded.com) [00:00:00] We battle with this thought every single day. Am I impressive enough? Are people going to like me? Here's one unimpressive trick to stand out from the crowd, take care of yourself mentally, and still be an effective leader. [00:01:50] As an introvert, I realized that when I enter into a new setting, there are a lot of people who have something to say, but very few people listen to what is being said. What do I mean by that?... When you enter a room, oftentimes one person will ask a question, but there are layers to questions. [00:02:14] There are hidden patterns that are embedded inside a question, but oftentimes. People seek to answer before they seek to listen. And my friend Patrick has a saying that listen and silent are spelled with the same letters. And oftentimes the most unimpressive trick to standing out from a crowd is to listen. [00:02:35] Yeah, Not as impressive as you thought. Huh? That's exactly the point of this title. Oftentimes maintaining our energy and maintaining our mental sustenance and value in a room comes from listening. It comes from not seeking to go after the attention it's to go after the value and heart of other people. [00:02:58] Oftentimes when we think about someone who creates value and inclusivity and open space in a room, they think about someone who can carry a conversation. They think about someone who is charismatic and charming, but often underneath that is the desire to understand. It's the desire to seek first, to get to the heart of a human being before even opening their mouth to answer or providing advice. [00:03:25] There's the question beneath the question. After interacting with several people on clubhouse on Instagram and networking with different podcasters, I realized that so many of us have gotten good at talking. We know exactly what to say. We know the rules. 00:03:48] And so how do you get to the heart of a human being? There are different ways to listen. There are different ways to connect. Someone could ask you, for example, how, how do you make X, Y, and Z amount of money? Well, what type of business do you have? What type of community do you seek to garner? Who is your target audience? [00:04:11] I began to ask those questions before even saying anything. Listening comes with identifying other people's strengths and how they can benefit in the room. My pastor, when I was in high school, used to tell me that the star of any room is not the person who says. Hey, here I am. It's the person who says, Hey, there you are a great leader, an effective leader. [00:04:33] Sometimes the most prominent spiritual teachers are ones that identified the strength, energy, and humanity in people's souls before they even opened their mouths and bragging about themselves. Let other people brag about you, but make it a point to see the gold in other people because the world needs that we're hurting right now. [00:04:53] There's an economic instability going on in America. There are people who have lost their jobs. There are people who are looking to hope and there are people who are looking to dream. And so one of the key tricks to standing out in the crowd now is to actually care, is to actually listen. And that's it. [00:05:10] That's today's episode. If you love these bite-sized episodes, share with a friend, send this to someone who this could help and uplift. Episodes are now coming out three times a week for you. I plan on posting on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays in the hopes that this could help someone in need. So for all you fellow misfit creatives out there, keep creating, keep going. [00:05:37] This is Helen from whoyouneeded.com signing out, have a gorgeous rest of your day. Talk to you soon.