Mystery and paradox can sit comfortably with deep assurance. What do I mean? Becoming and overcoming characterise a bigger story we are called to live in. Our greatest gift to others is hidden in our deepest wounds. Initiation rites of passage have been universally practiced for thousands of years but Western culture does not acknowledge them. Before the industrial revolution boys spent all day with their fathers but this relationship was deeply disrupted with the onset of the industrial age. How much more is the father-son relationship severed with the all pervasive information age of techology? The profound pain in our personal and cultural story has conditioned us to avoid pain and yet rites of passage involve pain in order to live powerfully for others. Maybe Individualism is the greatest sickness of Western culture. To find our life we have to lose it, and we become by what we overcome by the Grace of God in the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. God's wounds speak most profoundly to our wounds.