This song as many other of my songs are not ready to be heard its because I truly struggle with my lupus effectig my central nervous system and the use of my hands to master what I need to edit to somehow finally get it heard . you know I have something to give back to the world . I got started later in my life teaching myself everything I know never knowing I had this ability to create music. Im not good at reaching out for help and its too long of a story to tell but I d sure like to tell it because it is truly the meaning for why I had to try somewhere. If anyone seriously could just help me so my hands can stay steady enough to finish I will truly do all the work..I have so oo much Id like to share its not ever been about the money but I could sure use the help if it should come to that so I can also build a foundation based on those who I know I could help. I was raised on creativity a love for music bless my mother .& my beloved extremely gifted grandfather who passed down that amazing gene I like to call The Gift' .my family who we all could have done so much in the creative sector had we not been so damaged by our childhood so much!! Wasted talent just in my family..now the grandchildren are gifted and it keeps running through us .Id like to somehow set the example for them that no matter what life has challenged us with if you just keep working hard at who you are what you know your destined to be. you stay believing in yourself and never forget god himself stands with you 24,7 its gonna most likely be the hardest thing you will ever do because life will knock you down so low you will want to give up. But you cant!!!! Cause thats when life challenges you and it will test every vital aspect of your being. And you cant!!!!! Give up!! Its not you and when and if you become ill omG!!!! Its like life teases your strength of will. You still dont!!!! Give up!!! Even if you have to ask for help...thats the hardest part you ll do ever!! Because no one has ever tried to help you. Now your tested to see if your going to make that last stretch ....and you have to learn to humble yourself cause your sick and its not just about you its about everyone ..and why our world is so oo broken ...we each owe it to the world to give of ourselves and its time for doing something that may matter. Its trying no matter what . if we dont try we never know if just maybe that last try makes the differance for someone who because we tried that differance was made even when We are no longer here. The moral is our suffering never. Has to be in vain. We all suffer but why? We are suffering and having to learn what from it? We dont suffer for nothing. There is a difinitive point and reason. We have to unravel that aspect of our suffering. I have learned that without suffering we would not understand empathy compassion,sorrow we would not know that the trueness of love..is suffering for those we care and deeply love. Our soldiers do it every day...there suffering so we live so we are safe..so that we can be happy so we enjoy the freedoms we have every single day.they suffer not being with those they love knowing they may never come home. There suffering for all of us and so are there families for them ..why because thats how much they love there country and the people in it. LOVE is why we understand that suffering is something that we must all endure for reasons or situations we create. And my heart truly feels the sorrow and sadness of this world. It hurts to feel so much sorrow. Yet look at what that sorrow and suffering has caused me and given me to create.. this beautiful abiity to create a story that just maybe one day will tell the world why we must never give up .to teach our children that its ok if your broken ...you are still someone amazing!!!! But before its too late they need to understand the gravity of such a delicate critical and very fragie situation that unbelievably it is extremely vital for them to speak without feeling abandoned by there families or lost and alone and very afraid. If they have no one it could be very devastatig You can literally lose yourself and they will lose themselves because thats the reality of the impact and degree to wich neglecting them will cause them a great amount of suffering and grief.if it is not addressed and spoken of so that the mental aspect of the brain is not severly effected. It can be fatal and it can be very damaging that you will fight like hell getting yourself well at times not knowing outta of it all that its because of that moment or tramatic trauma that changed who you could have been along time ago..it will destroy or change your life completely .or it will strenghthen whats left for the better if you can see you are not alone in that fight..because you are so unaware of. My life is something I need to try to make some kinda of an impact with .I know my story my music my life can eventually help someone..please. Help me to try to make that differance. My health is depleting my ability to play in the way i long desprately for..my name is Jessie well jessica but everyone calls me Jessie I have systemic lupus and its effecting my central nervouse system to the point of effecting my heart .I am a very intelligent person as I can speak well. at times its difficult to speak not because i dont know how its that I will sometimes sound as though i dont know how but the damage seems to keep the intelligence in tact ...thank god..my hands bend themselvez where i cannot unfold them yet there are times I can do just fine and then my hands do there own set of skills on the keys and its soo frustrating. For the first time I am telling the world that my illness has caused me to humble myself to you because my story and my music could help or save someones life.I want to give back to the world before something happens to me. I have all my life struggled to become something where i can help someone.I am month to month trying to make my life better I wanted and im going to become a sound engineer and to work for myself eventually. One day I will see my music and hear it one day on motion picture as a score. writing music is my Dream and this is the year I make it all happen. I have spent the last 7years teaching myself to master something of what is my music and it has felt like a life time of a fight to make life happen. I am not finished yet as I conquer obstacles of what I call 'I will not!!!! Give up!!!I am trying to write a book my life is a story that even makes me cry cause i cant believe im still alive and have made it thus far. I guess my will is greater to save someone elses life as I. Pray and hope one day I will. Things I have learned have made me the most grateful person alive that my creator deamed me worthy because he loved me enough and he knew that I would never give up and that I was the one he chose to create this beautiful amazing gift he bestowed upon me in my suffering that he knew I was strong enough to realize the true meaning in such suffering that he entrusted in me to not just tell the story but for you to see I am that story and look how Even I save me in its end of understanding why I needed to be the story..so that I could see who Id really become because of it.How amazing is that to not know anything about love to fighting for nothing but love in the end because someone cared enough to see who i truly was pass broken that by doing so look at what that did...I hope to hear from someone thanks for listening...Jessie Garcia songinfminor67@gmailcom
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