https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/help-machine-ranch-road--7401468
Callers call in to the help machine line for guidance and advice, each episode is themed to illustrate a main point in personal development but structured in a relatable, comedic and avant-garde way. you have to hear it to believe it! 


💪Support The Show AND get merch💪
MERCH - https://the-help-machine.printful.me








*This podcast is for entertainment and informational purposes only. It does not constitute medical, mental health, financial, or legal advice. Always consult a qualified professional for guidance specific to your situation.*]]>enComedyCopyright The Help Machinehttps://d3wo5wojvuv7l.cloudfront.net/t_rss_itunes_square_1400/images.spreaker.com/original/65a1a764ab41b6304260d1e36d05a1d1.jpghttps://www.spreaker.com/podcast/help-machine-ranch-road--7401468Wed, 30 Sep 2026 15:40:34 +0000The Help MachineThe Help Machinefeeds@spreaker.comWelcome to the help machine, where late night comedy Meets Personal Development! Callers call in to the help machine line for guidance and advice, each episode is themed to illustrate a main point in personal development but structured in a...
Callers call in to the help machine line for guidance and advice, each episode is themed to illustrate a main point in personal development but structured in a relatable, comedic and avant-garde way. you have to hear it to believe it! 


💪Support The Show AND get merch💪
MERCH - https://the-help-machine.printful.me








*This podcast is for entertainment and informational purposes only. It does not constitute medical, mental health, financial, or legal advice. Always consult a qualified professional for guidance specific to your situation.*]]>truedef91f31-477b-5a54-9390-3df90ccd9852trueepisodichttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/35-trauma-and-forgiveness--75404654We're sorry..............................sorry.....................................................................................




..............................................................................................we're sorry...........................





sorry..................................................................................................................................sorry












Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org


This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>https://api.spreaker.com/episode/75404654Mon, 28 Sep 2026 04:53:18 +0000trueThe Help MachineWe're sorry..............................sorry..................................................................................... ..............................................................................................we're...We're sorry..............................sorry.....................................................................................




..............................................................................................we're sorry...........................





sorry..................................................................................................................................sorry












Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org


This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>8195bpoil,comedy,forgiveandforget,forgiveness,i'msorry,personaldevelopment,regret,selfdevelopment,selfhelp,sorry,thehelpmachine,trauma,we'resorrytruefullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/31-spocks-emotional-damage--75404584HELP! the vulcans are very emotional and need the help machine! the SPACE HELP MACHINE!

















Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org




This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>https://api.spreaker.com/episode/75404584Mon, 28 Sep 2026 04:45:09 +0000trueThe Help MachineHELP! the vulcans are very emotional and need the help machine! the SPACE HELP MACHINE! Lecture clips: Leo Gura, https://actualized.org/HELP! the vulcans are very emotional and need the help machine! the SPACE HELP MACHINE!

















Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org




This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>8735angry,comedy,content,emotion,emotional,emotionaldamage,emotions,happy,personaldevelopment,psychology,sad,selfdevelopment,selfhelp,space,thehelpmachinetruefullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/30-the-broken-family-projector--75404460Tony soprano is a real projector objector, but lets see if the help machine can offer him any assistance after he assaulted his own therapist.

This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>https://api.spreaker.com/episode/75404460Mon, 28 Sep 2026 04:34:29 +0000trueThe Help MachineTony soprano is a real projector objector, but lets see if the help machine can offer him any assistance after he assaulted his own therapist.Tony soprano is a real projector objector, but lets see if the help machine can offer him any assistance after he assaulted his own therapist.

This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>9305comedy,gabagool,help,mafia,personaldevelopment,projecting,psychology,selfdevelopment,selfhelp,thehelpmachinetruefullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/29-yoda-don-t-text-and-walk--75404343This week we learn how to use the force!.. I mean we learn why we shouldn't text and walk at the same time.














Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org
Rob Dial, The Mindset Mentor


This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>https://api.spreaker.com/episode/75404343Mon, 28 Sep 2026 04:21:14 +0000trueThe Help MachineThis week we learn how to use the force!.. I mean we learn why we shouldn't text and walk at the same time. Lecture clips: Leo Gura, https://actualized.org/ Rob Dial, The Mindset MentorThis week we learn how to use the force!.. I mean we learn why we shouldn't text and walk at the same time.














Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org
Rob Dial, The Mindset Mentor


This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>10368aware,awareness,comedy,distractedwalking,focus,holon,horse,personaldevelopment,reality,selfdevelopment,selfhelp,spirit,theforce,usetheforcetruefullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/28-sleeping-is-bad-for-your-health--75404301This week we learn the dangers of sleeping and why sleeping is in no way beneficial at all to your health.

This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>https://api.spreaker.com/episode/75404301Mon, 28 Sep 2026 04:12:10 +0000trueThe Help MachineThis week we learn the dangers of sleeping and why sleeping is in no way beneficial at all to your health.This week we learn the dangers of sleeping and why sleeping is in no way beneficial at all to your health.

This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>7600bed,comedy,goodnight,midnight,nighttime,personaldevelopment,podcast,rest,selfdevelopment,selfhelp,sleep,sleepdeprived,sleeping,thehelpmachinetruefullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/26-meditation-nation--75404201This week we learn that Kermit the frog does not like the smell of bacon. We also learn how to calm our mind so that you don't become a raging alcoholic like Jim Henson!















Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org


This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>https://api.spreaker.com/episode/75404201Mon, 28 Sep 2026 04:00:12 +0000trueThe Help MachineThis week we learn that Kermit the frog does not like the smell of bacon. We also learn how to calm our mind so that you don't become a raging alcoholic like Jim Henson! Lecture clips: Leo Gura, https://actualized.org/This week we learn that Kermit the frog does not like the smell of bacon. We also learn how to calm our mind so that you don't become a raging alcoholic like Jim Henson!















Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org


This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>7633calm,calming,calmmind,comedic,comedy,comedypodcast,meditating,meditation,personaldevelopment,quiet,selfdevelopment,selfhelp,solitude,thehelpmachinetruefullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/25-d-e-p-r-e-s-s-i-o-n--75404166Horace was too depressed to host this weeks show but luckily Jason (your long-time pal and friend)  volunteered to man the help machine!














Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org
Rob Dial, The Mindset Mentor


This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>https://api.spreaker.com/episode/75404166Mon, 28 Sep 2026 03:53:20 +0000trueThe Help MachineHorace was too depressed to host this weeks show but luckily Jason (your long-time pal and friend)  volunteered to man the help machine! Lecture clips: Leo Gura, https://actualized.org/ Rob Dial, The Mindset MentorHorace was too depressed to host this weeks show but luckily Jason (your long-time pal and friend)  volunteered to man the help machine!














Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org
Rob Dial, The Mindset Mentor


This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>8020anxiety,chronicdepression,comedic,comedy,depressed,depressing,depression,happniess,happy,help,selfdevelopment,selfhelp,thehelpmachinetruefullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/24-anxiety-simulator-5000--75400841Remove your headphones and lets freak out! This week were drinking 4 whole pots of coffee while we learn to fix our anxiety with the soothing sounds of car alarms and fox news alerts.















Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org




This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>https://api.spreaker.com/episode/75400841Sun, 27 Sep 2026 18:53:04 +0000trueThe Help MachineRemove your headphones and lets freak out! This week were drinking 4 whole pots of coffee while we learn to fix our anxiety with the soothing sounds of car alarms and fox news alerts. Lecture clips: Leo Gura, https://actualized.org/Remove your headphones and lets freak out! This week were drinking 4 whole pots of coffee while we learn to fix our anxiety with the soothing sounds of car alarms and fox news alerts.















Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org




This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>11687ahh!,alert,anxiety,anxious,anxiousness,calmdown,calming,coffee,comedy,overstimulated,personaldevelopment,selfhelp,tweak,tweakintruefullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/23-i-did-nothing-wrong--75400704This week on the ranch we get stuck in traffic and learn the single biggest reason people stay stuck in life....Traffic!















Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org




This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>https://api.spreaker.com/episode/75400704Sun, 27 Sep 2026 18:22:15 +0000trueThe Help MachineThis week on the ranch we get stuck in traffic and learn the single biggest reason people stay stuck in life....Traffic! Lecture clips: Leo Gura, https://actualized.org/This week on the ranch we get stuck in traffic and learn the single biggest reason people stay stuck in life....Traffic!















Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org




This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>11824comedic,comedy,focus,help,helpmachine,mindovermatter,mindset,personaldevelopment,selfdevelopment,selfhelp,traffic,victim,victimmindsettruefullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/22-how-to-buy-things-you-don-t-need--75400223This week we prove that material possessions actually do make us happy!
who would have thought??











Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org
Rob Dial, The Mindset Mentor

TV clip:
Hoarders (A&E)

This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>https://api.spreaker.com/episode/75400223Sun, 27 Sep 2026 17:01:12 +0000trueThe Help MachineThis week we prove that material possessions actually do make us happy! who would have thought?? Lecture clips: Leo Gura, https://actualized.org/ Rob Dial, The Mindset Mentor TV clip: Hoarders (A&E)This week we prove that material possessions actually do make us happy!
who would have thought??











Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org
Rob Dial, The Mindset Mentor

TV clip:
Hoarders (A&E)

This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>95131800gotjunk,clutter,comedic,comedy,hoarders,hoarding,junk,packrat,personaldevelopment,selfdevelopment,selfhelp,shoppingtruefullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/21-i-m-the-best--75399983This episode explains why we are all such assholes to each other.
Especially christian bale!















Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org

This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>https://api.spreaker.com/episode/75399983Sun, 27 Sep 2026 16:44:27 +0000trueThe Help MachineThis episode explains why we are all such assholes to each other. Especially christian bale! Lecture clips: Leo Gura, https://actualized.org/This episode explains why we are all such assholes to each other.
Especially christian bale!















Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org

This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>13113batman,comedic,comedy,comedypodcast,ego,egoic,funny,hubris,humorous,personaldevelopment,podcast,selfdevelopment,selfhelp,thehelpmachinetruefullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/20-insights-come-from-alabama--75399767This week we are changing our light bulbs, both in the studio and in our minds! We learn what the fuck an insight is and why the fuck there so fucking important.















Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org

This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>https://api.spreaker.com/episode/75399767Sun, 27 Sep 2026 16:24:38 +0000trueThe Help MachineThis week we are changing our light bulbs, both in the studio and in our minds! We learn what the fuck an insight is and why the fuck there so fucking important. Lecture clips: Leo Gura, https://actualized.org/This week we are changing our light bulbs, both in the studio and in our minds! We learn what the fuck an insight is and why the fuck there so fucking important.















Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org

This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>8963comedypodcast,fuck,funny,howtolearn,idea,ideas,insights,learn,learning,newideas,personaldevelopment,selfdevelopment,selfhelp,thinkingtruefullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/19-education--75391460
.....Im still pissed off that smiling friends is off the air...














Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org



This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>https://api.spreaker.com/episode/75391460Sun, 27 Sep 2026 05:17:48 +0000trueThe Help MachineThis week we get a higher education and learn how to learn. .....Im still pissed off that smiling friends is off the air... Lecture clips: Leo Gura, https://actualized.org/
.....Im still pissed off that smiling friends is off the air...














Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org



This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>9757comedy,education,graduation,helpmachine,learn,learning,neurons,neuroprogramming,personaldevelopment,school,selfdevelopment,selfhelptruefullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/17-combining-exercise-with-tv--75391381This week Billy and his coke addicted 2nd cousin Richard teach us a thing or two about fitness and why it's imperative that we must combine exercise with TV!















Lecture clips:
Rob Dial, The Mindset Mentor

This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>https://api.spreaker.com/episode/75391381Sun, 27 Sep 2026 05:08:53 +0000trueThe Help MachineThis week Billy and his coke addicted 2nd cousin Richard teach us a thing or two about fitness and why it's imperative that we must combine exercise with TV! Lecture clips: Rob Dial, The Mindset MentorThis week Billy and his coke addicted 2nd cousin Richard teach us a thing or two about fitness and why it's imperative that we must combine exercise with TV!















Lecture clips:
Rob Dial, The Mindset Mentor

This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>8249comedy,exercise,health,healthy,healthyliving,longlife,personaldevelopment,prankcast,selfhelp,tv,workingout,workouttruefullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/15-addicted-to-balloons--75391179This week we are huffing air duster because it's really cool and it helps us forget about our problems in life.


-SMOKE-




-Are ya smokin yet?!?!-






Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org


TV clips:
 from Intervention (A&E)

This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>https://api.spreaker.com/episode/75391179Sun, 27 Sep 2026 04:58:53 +0000trueThe Help MachineThis week we are huffing air duster because it's really cool and it helps us forget about our problems in life. -SMOKE- -Are ya smokin yet?!?!- Lecture clips: Leo Gura, https://actualized.org/ TV clips:  from Intervention (A&E)This week we are huffing air duster because it's really cool and it helps us forget about our problems in life.


-SMOKE-




-Are ya smokin yet?!?!-






Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org


TV clips:
 from Intervention (A&E)

This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>109601year,addiction,airduster,comedy,lifeline,personaldevelopment,recovery,relapse,selfhelp,sober,sobriety,toughlovetruefullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/14-the-mysterious-caller--75390963This week we continue to unravel the mystery of the mysterious caller while we do our daily toothpaste errands and listen to the horse radio.

This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>https://api.spreaker.com/episode/75390963Sun, 27 Sep 2026 04:35:02 +0000trueThe Help MachineThis week we continue to unravel the mystery of the mysterious caller while we do our daily toothpaste errands and listen to the horse radio.This week we continue to unravel the mystery of the mysterious caller while we do our daily toothpaste errands and listen to the horse radio.

This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>6063am,amradio,audiodrama,carradio,comedy,comedyshow,fm,fmradio,horse,lifeline,personaldevelopment,prankcast,radio,selfhelp,thehelpmachine,toothpastetruefullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/13-the-scavenger-hunt--75390639Just a normal episode where nothing weird happens.


Yup....



This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>https://api.spreaker.com/episode/75390639Sun, 27 Sep 2026 04:09:39 +0000trueThe Help MachineJust a normal episode where nothing weird happens. Yup....Just a normal episode where nothing weird happens.


Yup....



This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>5854audiodrama,comedy,comedypodcast,drama,game,grwyourself,personaldevelopment,prankcast,selfhelp,thehelpmachinetruefullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/12-what-happened-to-your-money-in-2009--75390103This week we help people learn fiscal responsibility and we even get a visit from Peter Parker. he really needs his money now.

*NOT SPONSORED BY JG WENTWORTH*
















Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org



This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>https://api.spreaker.com/episode/75390103Sun, 27 Sep 2026 03:51:08 +0000trueThe Help MachineThis week we help people learn fiscal responsibility and we even get a visit from Peter Parker. he really needs his money now. *NOT SPONSORED BY JG WENTWORTH* Lecture clips: Leo Gura, https://actualized.org/This week we help people learn fiscal responsibility and we even get a visit from Peter Parker. he really needs his money now.

*NOT SPONSORED BY JG WENTWORTH*
















Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org



This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>10104budgeting,comedy,comedyshow,currency,finance,finances,helpmachine,money,moneyproblems,prankcast,savingmoney,thehelpmachinetruefullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/10-yad-skeap-niwt-yppah--75390118For the first half of this show I was possessed by bob. luckily I eventually broke through, anyway lets all eat some diet lasagna!

















R.I.P - David Lynch

This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>https://api.spreaker.com/episode/75390118Sun, 27 Sep 2026 03:44:47 +0000trueThe Help MachineFor the first half of this show I was possessed by bob. luckily I eventually broke through, anyway lets all eat some diet lasagna! R.I.P - David LynchFor the first half of this show I was possessed by bob. luckily I eventually broke through, anyway lets all eat some diet lasagna!

















R.I.P - David Lynch

This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>8394avantgarde,comedy,davidlynch,garmonbozia,laurapalmer,markfrost,personaldevelopment,prankcast,selfhelp,thehelpmachine,twinpeakstruefullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/11-take-me-to-church--75390023We visit the local place of worship and learn that indoctrination can make anyone actually kill a helpless kitten. After that we cook up some holy butter.

Special thanks to "frank" who gave us our very first voicemail.















Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org



This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>https://api.spreaker.com/episode/75390023Sun, 27 Sep 2026 03:11:57 +0000trueThe Help MachineWe visit the local place of worship and learn that indoctrination can make anyone actually kill a helpless kitten. After that we cook up some holy butter. Special thanks to "frank" who gave us our very first voicemail. Lecture clips:...We visit the local place of worship and learn that indoctrination can make anyone actually kill a helpless kitten. After that we cook up some holy butter.

Special thanks to "frank" who gave us our very first voicemail.















Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org



This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>7609church,comedy,indoctrination,jesus,personaldevelopment,prankcast,santa,satan,selfhelp,sunday,thehelpmachinetrue11fullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/9-food-for-thought--75380210This week we take a trip to the grocery store and Cathy Mitchell cooks up some eggsters and extra toppings in only 20 cheese minutes.
sponsored by weeber cooks…..go wildcats













Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org



This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>https://api.spreaker.com/episode/75380210Sat, 26 Sep 2026 15:47:51 +0000trueThe Help MachineThis week we take a trip to the grocery store and Cathy Mitchell cooks up some eggsters and extra toppings in only 20 cheese minutes. sponsored by weeber cooks…..go wildcats Lecture clips: Leo Gura, https://actualized.org/This week we take a trip to the grocery store and Cathy Mitchell cooks up some eggsters and extra toppings in only 20 cheese minutes.
sponsored by weeber cooks…..go wildcats













Lecture clips:
Leo Gura, Actualized.org



This episode includes AI-generated content.]]>10834bread,comedy,eating,eggs,feed,food,grocerystore,healthy,healthyeating,meal,paperorplastic,personaldevelopment,prankcast,selfhelp,shop,shoppingtrue9full