http://iamayapodcast.wordpress.comenPersonal JournalsCopyright Aya Ruanehttps://d3wo5wojvuv7l.cloudfront.net/t_rss_itunes_square_1400/images.spreaker.com/original/54d84b1f72ed476c76f3784cc046298c.jpghttp://iamayapodcast.wordpress.comWed, 07 Apr 2021 17:27:20 +0000Aya RuaneAya Ruaneusetheforceaya@gmail.comIn the aftermath of my 16 month old daughter’s murder, I’m just trying to breathe in, breathe out and be happy doing it.yesepisodichttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/episode-11-how-my-music-reflects-my-stages-of-grief--42841250https://api.spreaker.com/episode/42841250Fri, 08 Jan 2021 10:08:27 +0000Aya RuaneI talk about how I used my music to cope and about the way that my music shows my ups and downs throughout the last five months.1376coping,father,grief,grieving,hip-hip,music,rap,rapperyesfullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/episode-10-life-with-fana--42755988https://api.spreaker.com/episode/42755988Sat, 02 Jan 2021 06:05:51 +0000Aya RuaneIn this episode I switch things up by talking about what life was like when my daughter was alive. I talk about the joy that she brought me and the good times that we had.1203child-death,fanasdaddy,grief,grieving,iamaya,loss,mental-healthyesfullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/episode-9-when-you-don-t-grieve-well--42746490https://api.spreaker.com/episode/42746490Fri, 01 Jan 2021 10:13:10 +0000Aya RuaneI talk about my struggles throughout my five months of grieving, and the mistakes that I’ve been making. I talk about how important it is to actually allow yourself to grieve and how I stopped letting myself process.2230child-death,fanasdaddy,grief,grief-processing,grieving,iamaya,loss,sufferingyesfullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/episode-8-god-and-me--42725571https://api.spreaker.com/episode/42725571Wed, 30 Dec 2020 19:50:07 +0000Aya RuaneI talk about my views on God, how I came to them and how it shapes who I am.1259faith,fanasdaddy,grief-recovery,iamaya,spiritualityyesfullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/sit-down-with-aya-3--42716280https://api.spreaker.com/episode/42716280Wed, 30 Dec 2020 06:08:48 +0000Aya RuaneI talk about my relationship issues and what im doing about them.1159breakups,grief-and-loss,relationshipsyesfullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/episode-7-let-s-talk-about-suffering-part-three--42698762https://api.spreaker.com/episode/42698762Tue, 29 Dec 2020 21:00:02 +0000Aya RuaneI talk more about the state of suffering, and how it affects us physically, mentally and emotionally. I talk about how hard it is to exit a state of depression and what works for me to combat it.958child-death,depression,grief,grief-and-loss,grief-recovery,mental-health,sufferingyesfullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/side-sit-down-with-aya-2--42707964https://api.spreaker.com/episode/42707964Tue, 29 Dec 2020 17:30:53 +0000Aya RuaneTalking about shit I’m going through right now. Falling in love in early grief, emotional issues, etc.832break-ups,grief-and-loss,grief-recovery,relationship-issues,relationship-talkyesfullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/episode-6-let-s-talk-about-suffering-part-two--42696566https://api.spreaker.com/episode/42696566Tue, 29 Dec 2020 17:00:12 +0000Aya RuaneI talk more about how suffering has effected me. I explain why it’s important to maintain control over the way that you view your suffering, and talk briefly about how to get out of your state of suffering934child-death,father,grief,husband,personal-development,personal-growth,personal-journal,personal-journey,sufferingyesfullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/side-sit-down-with-aya-1--42700367https://api.spreaker.com/episode/42700367Tue, 29 Dec 2020 04:15:55 +0000Aya RuaneJust talking about some current, right now stuff. Relationships, friendships, love, loyalty and heartbreak.1665betrayal,breakups,friendships,heartbreak,love,relationshipsyesfullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/episode-5-let-s-talk-about-suffering-pt-1--42694030https://api.spreaker.com/episode/42694030Mon, 28 Dec 2020 22:00:02 +0000Aya RuaneI talk about what it means to suffer, why we as humans experience suffering and share about some of the things that cause me to suffer.705child-death,death,father,grief,grief-and-loss,grief+podcast,sufferingyesfullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/episode-4-goals-and-moving-foward--42688511https://api.spreaker.com/episode/42688511Mon, 28 Dec 2020 17:00:06 +0000Aya RuaneIn this episode I talk about goals and how they helped keep me going. I talk about worrying about what comes next once I accomplish all of my goals, and touch a bit on what it means to me to be a husband and a father.926child-death,fatherhood,goals,grief,grief-and-loss,grief+podcast,grief-recovery,husband-fatheryesfullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/episode-3-i-can-feel-my-soul--42686494https://api.spreaker.com/episode/42686494Mon, 28 Dec 2020 06:54:43 +0000Aya RuaneI talk about how when I found my daughter I felt such a dark, heavy sorrow in my soul that I became aware of the fact that I had my soul. I go into the dream that I had in a little bit more detail.805child-death,father,grief-and-loss,grief-recovery,husband,murder,soul.yesfullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/episode-2-life-after--42686377https://api.spreaker.com/episode/42686377Mon, 28 Dec 2020 06:33:34 +0000Aya RuaneI discuss the first few weeks after Fana’s death, how I struggled to cope, and the challenges that I faced.799child-death,family,father,grief,husbandyesfullhttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/episode-1-parent-of-a-murdered-child--42686178https://api.spreaker.com/episode/42686178Mon, 28 Dec 2020 06:07:15 +0000Aya RuaneThis episode acts as an introduction to myself. I give a little background on myself as a parent of a murdered child. My daughter, Fana, was shot in the head by her mother at only 16 months old.832child,family,father,grief,husband,loss,loss-of-life,loyalty,struggleyesfull