https://www.spreaker.com/show/ashmita-rais-showenSociety & CultureCopyright Ashmita Raihttps://d3wo5wojvuv7l.cloudfront.net/images.spreaker.com/cloudinary/s--7KH9eKVS--/w_1000,h_800,c_fit,l_text:Lato_162_bold:Ashmita%20Rai%20s%20show/images.spreaker.com/default/show-1400x1400-20190801.jpghttps://www.spreaker.com/show/ashmita-rais-showFri, 04 Aug 2017 18:38:51 +0000Ashmita RaiAshmita Raifeeds@spreaker.comcleanepisodicAshmita Raifeeds@spreaker.comNohttps://www.spreaker.com/user/10000773/of-yes-consent-author-unknownhttps://api.spreaker.com/episode/12505237Fri, 04 Aug 2017 18:38:49 +0000Ashmita RaiI was five when I was not looking, but I secretly wanted him to do it because I said prove you love me because he told me all the time and at five I did not grasp a concept that loving is something we should save until later like we are flower buds...341sex,love,poetry,boundaries,consentcleanfullAshmita RaiI was five when I was not looking, but I secretly wanted him to do it because I said prove you love me because he told me all the time and at five I did not grasp a concept that loving is something we should save until later like we are flower buds covered by snow fall waiting for someone to warm us to life, to become whole like love isn’t the thread that sews the cosmos together, composing the fabric or our souls and our parents told us we weren’t allowed to do those things or say those things until we were old, but I am here to tell you please don’t think so hard about love because it springs like wild flowers in the spring sun. My next kiss was at seventeen in the back of a car and it was messy but no one really talks about kissing being something needing practicing and feeling like you are counting the times you are breathing praying you are good and I kissed that boy for the next 3 years and he melted me and felt mostly like daisies and a lot like the dirt they grow from but young is always a good age to fall in love, but I still remember the time when we were on my parent’s couch and eighteen felt a lot like free falling and not caring where I landed and I remember thinking that he was deserving of my body and him pushing boundaries with fingers and things even when I said “not ready” when in reality my walls were crumbling with each prodding thinking maybe I should just be ready and my “friend” told me what’s the big deal, touch it already and things were messy and I remember the time I really felt like my body was just a means to his end when my face was being forced against him and I hope he tasted the fear and anger on my tongue and I remember apologizing to him for getting so mad about “nothing.” It’s nothing people say, what’s the big deal about sex and bodies consuming each other, exploring each other like we are not the most beautiful, poetic of worlds as if we can fill emptiness with more emptiness. I remember when the daisies died and then I ended up dating this guy for a couple of times and I told him over again, kiss me but don’t touch my thighs and the same day he swore, “I didn’t know what I was touching” and I ended up apologizing for having to move his hand away, but at twenty-one I am not sorry for refusing to reduce others’ to solely skin and for the times guys have said you just turn me on too much and they just can’t help themselves, my body is not your burden and I am not made to relieve you from this And for all of the guys who understand the idea of consent and it being active, thank you And for all of the women who understand the idea of consent and it being active, thank you, please for the love of god, continue. And then the day an almost stranger asked in the pouring rain if he could kiss me I said yes because I wanted to and there it was so simply.No